It’s 33 days until the brain surgery that may or may not cure Ryan’s epilepsy. Today was just another day to countdown.
Maybe it was the bad night’s sleep (for both of us). Maybe it was the stress of work or the concern over the sick dog. Maybe it was just Epilepsy generally. There are so many things we can point to but we don’t know for sure what caused Ryan to wake up with myoclonic jerks. Even after morning meds and a rescue med, he still had some minor jerks.
At least as far as we know that is all he had. I felt terrible leaving Ryan but I had a lot on my plate at work that also needed my attention. Absence seizures have been more frequent lately. That could be a good or a bad thing. Ryan would have no way of knowing if he had one unless he happened to drop something when turning his head and looking like he’s daydreaming. When I’ve found him in the middle of an absence seizure, I’ve been able to pull him out of it. But today I wasn’t home and he wasn’t at work so we can only assume he only had myoclonic jerks.
Ryan is such a trooper. He continues to count down to the surgery. He continues to keep to a strict food regimen and to workout (albeit adapted at times due to the epilepsy) so that he can be as healthy as possible to make it through the brain surgery and recover quickly.
As much as I am nervous about this surgery and scared to leave him alone for even a short amount of time…I am in awe of Ryan’s stamina, focus, and strength. I know he is nervous about this surgery as well but our perspectives are different and our motivation to keep counting down to the surgery is different as well.
I think we are both learning to take one day at a time. As of today, we have 33 days to go. Today, was just another day of Epilepsy.